Things Poetic

 Friday Crushed against the smeared window, in the wobbling door of the train  seemingly refusing to keep a constant direction or speed, momentum interrupted or is it stationery interrupted by jerky movements, an elderly man fighting trembling and shaking limbs bodies follow the movement, in echo out of concert smell of skunk wafts around from the youth, slouching as she thumbs her way around an ugly brick of a phone, diamante designs reflecting her skin red and swollen eruptions marking the unhealthy glistening pink 'we apologise...' goes the tannoy 'for the delay. this was (this timothy have an excuse) caused by...' scrolls through the choice of reasons... 'someone being hit by a train in the Leyton area....' silence screams in my head

 Distress Smiling, it belies the pain underneath,  Still there, yet, not The destruction inside, masking on the out tremble in the hand, shake in the voice, catch in the throat watching distant

 holiday train, tube, train more train sleeper train train train relax.......uffizi, Italian food..... train train sleeper train train train car home

Mirror Is the way I see my face, in the reflection the same as the face other people see mirrored, reflected or changed is the dark I see, the same as what others,  you, see are the faults I know I have, the same or do they see far worse is my souls light actually darker and I just see the negative, looking ok to me, but a vacuum to anyone and everyone else

herself  She wasn't the thing she saw herself as a dark, bad, selfish, manipulating shadow of whom she is That glint,  the precious metal shining through the layers of hurt, of self doubt, of blame, catching the shimmering sunlight  trying to be the person his faith told her she should be Hiding from judgement hiding the beauty from herself that I saw, from the beginning Its the eyes that can't hide it, full of pain, of loss, of hurt, yet bubbling up at a moment circles of colour, or uniqueness, lips lifting into a joyous laugh,  skin catching that in a flush of otherworldly abandon, not otherworldly  ethereal from another age, another life, past, future

 Normality Bound in societal norm, Do this this way, don't do that, Wear this, do your hair like that this....that Life and living determined by abstract views, ethereal preconceptions of normality a glance, a snigger, a full on stare, cruel words,  cutting words rejection of the person, in more than person, but also in words, deeds and thoughts at least we are not like that....like that abnormality like that outlier that unique once self assured person who is now empty, alone and lonely normality, a crutch that changes daily, and a sword to cut the legs from the unusual, to make the normal feel normal